![]() ![]() The second reason that we often say the wrong thing is because our first instincts are usually off. Our discomfort can make us fumble over our words or say things we don’t mean. ![]() “With conflict, there are typically negative emotions involved, and most of us aren’t comfortable with those kinds of feelings,” she says. Hill explained that the words we use in confrontations can get us into trouble for three reasons:įirst, the stakes are usually high when emotions are. So, when things start to heat up with a colleague - you don’t see eye-to-eye on a project or you aren’t happy with the way you were treated in a meeting, for example - how can you choose your words carefully? To help answer this question, I talked with Linda Hill, the Wallace Brett Donham Professor of Business Administration at Harvard Business School and faculty chair of the Leadership Initiative. She is also the co-author of Collective Genius: The Art and Practice of Leading Innovation and Being the Boss: The 3 Imperatives for Becoming a Great Leader. Other times you might say the exact thing that helps the person go from boiling mad to cool as a cucumber. Sometimes, regardless of how good your intentions are, what you say can further upset your coworker and just make the issue worse. When addressing a conflict with a colleague, the words matter. ![]()
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